Here is what took two decades of being in a heterosexual relationship to learn.
Like many people, my husband:
1. Takes what I say at face value.
2. Is not able to read my mind.
I wrote a thesis on gender differences in cognitive functioning back in the ‘80’s when I was doing a graduate degree in Psychology. You’d think I’d be smart about how men think—but you’d be wrong.
For too many years, and knowing I should know better, I expected my husband to think like me. This was especially true around my birthday. Oh, my birthday. Sigh. Every year, when he asked me what I wanted for my birthday, I would say, “Oh, don’t make a fuss.”
What did my husband “hear” when I said, “Don’t make a fuss”? What he heard was, “Don’t make a fuss.”
I know. Crazy, eh?
This was shocking to me. I expected him to hear what a woman would hear. Many women would realize I was speaking in code because they have been known to speak in code, too. What I really said (even though I really didn’t say it) was, “Get creative and surprise me.” And by that I was picturing rose petals strewn on the bed, candlelight, and a box of sexy lingerie (no, never mind—a box of good chocolate).
Given my husband couldn’t break the code, I was disappointed. Every. Single. Year. In fairness there wasn’t much my husband could do that was ever good enough. He did buy me a cell phone for my 40th birthday, which just about sent me into orbit. I think I pouted extra hard that year. A cell phone for a milestone birthday is not very romantic. (Where were the earrings, perfume, spa certificate, damn it?) To me, a cell phone was worse than no present at all.
It took me many miserable birthdays to realize I was perhaps being a tad unreasonable (ok, maybe more than a tad). After all, is it such a crime for my husband to actually believe me? Don’t women want their partners to take them seriously? I realize now that I was testing him unfairly. I convinced myself that if he really loved me, he would just know what to do. I shouldn’t have to spell it out for him, should I? Doesn’t that cheapen the experience?
Here is where I mucked up. There is a difference between saying, “Don’t make a fuss” and “Surprise me”. “Don’t make a fuss” can legitimately be interpreted as “Don’t make a fuss”. “Surprise me” is a different message—one that is less passive-aggressive, more straightforward and more (dare I say it) mature. And here’s an even better idea (and one that I finally adopted)—actually tell my husband what I want!
Radical idea, I know.
My birthday was yesterday. It was fantastic. I did many things right before my big day (drum roll, please…). I told my husband I wanted to go out for dinner with him and our two sons, and I suggested a restaurant with the best maple bourbon sours in town. I laid hints about cologne I liked, and a book I wanted to read.
And like magic—Bibbidi-Bobbidi-Boo—guess what appeared? A wonderful family dinner, lovely gift, and interesting bedtime reading!
Well, it wasn’t magic exactly. But you get the point.
Excerpt from January 2015 Bday Card from hubby:
Your parents did not plan your birthday well and for a long time you were bound and determined to make the worst of it. Thankfully we are all getting better at navigating the minefield. Still, I hope we never find all the mines. It’s all part of what makes you who you are – the woman I am madly in love with.
Photo credit: shira gal /flickr
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Pat O’Connor
Jan 8, 2015 -
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SUE! I’ll take a lesson from your playbook. Congrats to your family for giving what you asked for. Pat
Sue Nador
Jan 8, 2015 -
Awww, thanks Pat!!! I think I am getting better (and smarter!) with age..but it took a while!!!
Madeleine Greey
Jan 8, 2015 -
Happy Belated, Sue. Your husband sounds like the greatest guy!
Sue Nador
Jan 8, 2015 -
Thanks Mado! He is certainly the most tolerant man on the planet, that’s for sure. I must have done something good in a past life to deserve him!
Patti Pokorchak
Jan 9, 2015 -
WOW, with a card like that, I think he makes up for the past!
Asking for what you want and not expecting people to read your mind is very powerful AND gets you what you want too!
Happy Birthday and here’s to many more even better ones!
Sue Nador
Jan 9, 2015 -
Thanks, Patti. My mind is in such BIG PRINT I thought anyone could read it!
Rocca
Jan 14, 2015 -
John’s words sent endorphins through me faster than a 10K run! I love him.
Why do we still speak code? I have been struggling with this my whole life. Say what you want and see what happens. It is truly magical…like you said. Bibbidi-Bobbidi-Boo!! Thanks for sharing Sue.
Sue Nador
Jan 14, 2015 -
It seems so “easy” but it is so difficult to ask for what we want. I’m reading a book called “The Confidence Code” written for women like us. I’m wondering if we thought we were “worth it”, we’d be more assertive asking for what we want?